Being Perfect

I love what I read in Rev. Kathianne Lewis's newsletter this week. She talks about the word "perfect." She says in Aramaic the word "perfect" has other meanings, some of which were 'complete,' 'fulfilled' or 'mature.' That's Perfect! (sorry I couldn't resist it). At the heart of this lesson is "I am perfect, whole and complete - just as I am right here and now." How much time and energy have I spent comparing, critizing, condemning myself against others - a lot over the years. How much time do you and companies in particularly do the same - all with the intent of competing and "beating" others so they may be the perfect alternative for consumers. In reality, there is only one me. There always has been and always will be. There is only one you. Each of us are perfect just as we are - with all of our character defects right in there in the mix of things. It is that light and shadow that makes us this lovely tapestry that we call the world. And it all weaves together in harmony and balance - at least that was the intent of our creator. Finally, I love what Kathianne says about spiritual maturity. I am not the same person I was as a child. And that's not simply my mind and body that has evolved - it's my connection with source. For all those formative years when the world is constantly bombarding children with how to be, do and have - to "survive" in this world. Instead, wouldn't it be perfect if we realized we co-exist in this tapestry and in celebrating my perfection I celebrate yours and on and on and on. Join me in celebrating your perfect-ness, just as it is right here and right now.

The Shift

There are two movies, both called The Shift. I am referring to the one by Wayne Dyer. I highly recommend you watch this movie. The main part I want to share today is a survey he quotes: Quantum Change is the book I believe that came out of it. A survey was done where men and women were asked what's most important to them. And then many years later it was repeated after they had all had a moment that turned their values upside-down. Here's what came out of that: MEN went from: 1. Wealth --> Spirituality 2. Adventure --> Personal Peace 3. Achievement --> Family 4. Pleasure --> God's will 5. Respected --> Honesty WOMEN went from: 1. Family --> Personal growth 2. Independent --> Self-esteem 3. Career --> Spirituality 4. Fitting in --> Happiness 5. Attractiveness --> Forgiveness Granted he doesn't speak to how many people went through this and I ask you to entertain - think of the most life-defining moment in your life, we've all had them. What impact did that have on what's most important to you?

Tiger Woods: His Dad's Part

At least part of his Dad. This story and many others I'm sure are/will talk about Tiger's Dad who was caught cheating on his Mom when Tiger was a teenager. Most stories stop at making the very surface comparison of "like father, like son" and don't take the time to go deeper. Hopefully Tiger will go deeper from the inside out about the impact of this significant event in his life. He likely knows the answers already but clearly the actions haven't connected the dots. The one area I wonder if he will look at is Radical Forgiveness. Based on the article above it doesn't appear he has forgiven his father and there-in seen the pattern that likely shows up in his life. Ask yourself today, who do you need to truly forgive and let go of the poison that only eats you? Remember, hating and being angry at another does nothing to them - only to you.

Tiger Woods: Corporates and Truth

How facinating, the opportunities that Tiger Woods is enabling us to observe - if we choose. I am dedicating a series to studying many aspects of the Woods event, starting today with the corporate response. First, I want to be clear - yes, his personal affairs are his. And until we all boycott general media we better recognize that the facination with celebrity gossip is here to stay. AND there's another way to think about it - actually many other ways. That's the purpose of my exploration. Corporate response to such events: in this case, as in most - it is mixed. Gillette has said they are going cold on him; Nike says they "support his decision to withdraw from professional golf" and AT&T says it's "evaluating its relationship with Woods." All of them in my opinion are a bunch of wooses - plain and simple. When will a corporation have the balls to really take a stand. I have no attachment to what that stand should be but come out openly and speak to how an event like this does or does not tie with your corporate values (or other truths if you have them). Naturally, do that only if you are 100% living your mission and values as a corporation. I judge there's tons of contradiction to begin with - based on what's convenient for the corporation. Just as The Resonant Man is about being and living your 100% truth as an individual, it's just as true for corporations. After all they are the heart of major communities that set the tone for how a group lives it's truth and eventually each individual within that collective. Our current global economic crisis is a perfect time to reevaluate how seriously we take corporate governance and values. Let's learn from experiences such as the Tiger Woods event - rather than turning our back to them.

Life - Part 1

Yes it's been over a month since I've blogged and it feels great to be back writing again. Here's what inspired me this morning - an email from a friend, actually from The Universe. I will be sharing my perspectives on the quote about "life" by breaking it down into parts. Here goes: "Life - is not what you see, but what you've projected." Let me start with a simple example with an inanimate object - a water bottle that's sitting on my desk right now. I see a bottle. That's it. What I project about it can go on for many paragraphs but I'll spare you and illustrate with just a few examples. I project out to that bottle that I like it's color. I like that it's metal. I like the art that is stenciled onto it. I am sad the art is fading on it. I project that I need to clean it. It gives me the water of life that I believe helps me stay healthy and keeps my brain alert. I see it as my companion that goes with me everywhere. So imagine if my bottle was a person... would it know that I have just projected all this stuff about him/her onto it unless I share? Would that person care what I put out? Probably not as he/she is too busy projecting out to me, unlike the bottle that simple is being what it is - a bottle. Here's the other thing about the bottle. There is no other water bottle like mine out there. Yes there are many mass produced versions that look like my bottle but there's only one that's been touched by me. Who's art has faded just as mine has. That has my germs on it. Now imagine if we could all recognize the beauty in each of us as a unique expression of a higher power - the one source that connects us all. Share comments if you choose and stay tuned for Part 2.

I am Alive! - Part 3

One of my favorite songs is a Jewish chant "Li, la, la, lai, la la lai la lai - I am alive!" And then it goes "And who, is this aliveness I am, if it's not the blessed holy one!" That's aliveness to me. When I can remember that I am part of my creator and so are you - all created from one source. That I am responsible for creating my own heaven on earth and when I do that with love and giving to others I am alive. When I am living each moment on purpose, I am alive. When I am living a life of joy and love, I am alive. When I live a chant of releasing and letting go of what eats me, I am alive. When I accept my shadow and lean into it, just as much as my gold, I am alive. When I witness the God in you, I am alive. What's aliveness to you?

The Man In The Mirror

Regardless of where you stand on the "loved him" to "hated him" scale - Michael Jackson was a icon. I want to take a moment to honor his brilliance by remembering "The Man In The Mirror". I had never read the lyrics to this song till just now and I like what I read. Most of you who read my blog are familiar with the concept of the man in the mirror - that what I see in the world is simply a projection of myself. As we often say, "if you spot it, you got it." That's not exactly what Michael's lyrics are saying but what he does say is the beginning of going deeper to that level of oneness - of recognizing that we are all connected. What I think, feel, act upon with you is simply a reflection of what I see. Read the lyrics, and add comments on what you take of this popular song with deep meaning. Blessings to Michael Jackson for touching the hearts of millions.

Let Go, Let God

Thanks to the NPR series of God and our brain - thought this common saying "let go, let God" is appropriate to kick-off this week. Much can be said about this saying - get out of your own way, surrender, have faith that God always has my best interest in mind etc. For today, I want to focus on how to assist God when he shows us a sign that we need to do our part. For a few years now I've had a bad lower back. It flared up recently so in addition to going to a new chiropractor (who's working out great) I signed up with my favorite trainer of the past. He spent our first session focused on stretching and loosening tight spots or trigger points. I learnt how and where to use the foam roller and how to use a lacrosse ball to break up the knots, particularly in my glute and hamstring area. I have been instructed to do this at least 6 times a day. Yes a bit much I thought at first and I knew I had to do it. So the work began. At first the lacrosse ball simply sat on these hard knots and hurt like crazy. Then I started to feel the break down, the meltdown. I'm only a few days into this and I know that "I can" do it, with the faith that this too shall pass. My lesson in this has been again the reminder that if I simply let go and let God - anything is possible. This chronic/nagging pain has started to subside. The knot is relaxing - I am relaxing. And naturally, I have to remember to breath. So what part of you are you holding on to - not willing to let go, deny or suppress? Breath into it and let go - now!

Obama in Cairo

If you haven't already - take the time to click on Obama's picture for a link to the speech he gave on June 4 in Cairo. Most of Obama's speeches are historic and authentic in my opinion. What's critical about this talk is even if it makes a dent in the perception of American in the Muslim world - he's saved at least 1 life. Imagine, if every man and woman in battle or contemplating conflict/terrorism would be impacted even a bit by his words. All we need is for people to just stop and think - to respond rather than react. One life at a time - global peace IS possible. Obama is simply a mass vehicle of delivering this message AND believing it is possible. Now the question is - do YOU believe global peace is possible in this century?

Deep sadness and joy

Greetings - I have been quiet in sharing my feelings of things around me that move me - that's ultimately what this blog is about. And I am so grateful for this time of reflection. I'll save you the story but before I kick back into gear with posts let me share this about the past few weeks... I have experienced the deepest of sadness and the deepest of joy. And neither (especially the sadness) was about anything in particular - it just was. I am amused how the universe gives me opportunities to play with concepts I come in contact with. Many of you know my favorite sentiment lately is by Rumi: "Out beyond right-doing and wrong-doing there is a field. I'll meet you there." As I look back at the past few weeks - I believe I have touched the hem of this concept. What a magical place it is to be in. I have felt my own wrong-doing and forgiven it. I have felt my own need to be right and forgiven it. And more shall be revealed...

I am that.

I rarely blog about my own experience and I had one today I have to share. I have blogged about the concept of the "I am that I am" before. Today I was listening to Thomas Willhite, founder of PSI, talking about the I am. The 30 minute lecture is full of wisdom. What I want to share is my applying the concept I've known for a long time in a very different way today. First for those who are not familiar with the I am - my interpretation is that if you believe that we are all connected to one source, that we are all part of the Universe - then all is I and I am all. To some this may seem egotistical but at the core this is The concept that drives the world and will be the only thing that will save us from our shadows - yes, in my judgement. So today I found myself, out of the blue, looking at innanimate things and going "I am that and I am that and I am also that..." Things like the carpet in my office, my desk, the tiles in the bathroom, the water cooler, the ceiling tiles. Now, if you consider that as an experiment that's easy - since those items don't hold any energy in relation to me (or do they?) then I tried it with people. My usual voices of immediate/flash judgement went off as I walked by and interacted with people and a few times I was able to apply this concept. Wow! That person at the grocery store that was about to bug me - "I am that" and poof the thought vanished and neutralized. Try it on folks. I judge we need this concept like a life saver in the world we live in today.

The Truth

What is truth? I make a big deal about truth and as cliched as it is - "the truth shall set you free" is the truth. I went looking for meanings of the word. Nothing in the dictionary satisfied me. I found some quotes that come closer. Here's my perpective on a few of these - please share yours: "There is no god higher than truth." ~Mahatma Gandhi That is the most crisp definition I have found. What I assume in this quote is that truth is my pure essence, my source and void of my ego. "Truth only reveals itself when one gives up all preconceived ideas." ~Shoseki I don't know who Shoseki is but "preconceived ideas" seems like the ego-self so again, when I can tune into my source, I am void of ego/preconceived ideas of myself and the world - and I can see more clearly now. "Truth, like gold, is to be obtained not by its growth, but by washing away from it all that is not gold." ~Leo Tolstoy Now that hits it smack in the center of what The Resonant Man is all about - when I awake to my shadow and accept it (forgive myself) it washes/dilutes away. Please, do share your thoughts on truth. It's a topic I will cover often.

Forgiveness Works

I've covered The Responsibility Project before and it's worth covering very often. Please take a look at this short film by clicking on the picture. Send your perspectives on this story and share other similar efforts that look at personal responsibility. My three thoughts about this short story: #1. Forgiveness always works - of myself and those I resent. #2. Love always rules - All I put out is either love or fear. #3. Ripple effect - I seek to be proud of the wake/wave I leave. Love and thank you for being you.

"So what, now what?"

Caroline Myss spoke at CSL Friday night as part of the Extraordinary Speakers Series. If you know her work - it's full of wisdom and insights on healing ourselves through our spirit connection. The part I want to focus on is her Warrior like "call to action" to get people off the victim/story wagon and into action. 1. Intuition - she talked about how us "spiritual" types are all excited when we can prove how strong our instinct is. She says there's no doubt we are all innately intuitive but most of us are selective of when we want to use it, believe it, act upon it. We are good at avoiding it. She talked about holding oneself accountable for living at a high vibration. 2. Forgiveness - is not an option - it's a necessity. "Get over it and move on." She made fun (I haven't laughed so hard in a long time to it was great) of those of us (including me) who keep repeating our "story" and use it as a perpetual excuse. Stop the blame game and get over it. Classic case of "so what, now what." Doesn't mean you don't clean up - but once done - move on. 3. Spiritual self-esteem - following on the fact that we are all naturally intuitive, tapping into and strengthening our spiritual self-esteem is keen. 4. Smile - she tells a story of a man standing at a stop light about to cross a road. He was contemplating what form of suicide to take when he gets home. There's a car waiting for him to cross. He sees the woman waving him to cross, with a smile. Thanks to that one smile - he decides to live after all. Never under-estimate the power of your smile. 5. Service - in her years of work with crisis survivors she finds they always come out with a deep desire to do service for others. And they do. I encourage you to watch the many hours of free video on her site: http://www.myss.com/. And remember, smile a little more today!

Personal Responsibility & Choice = Freedom

Yes I have to blog about the historic inauguration of Barack Obama - the 44th President of the United States of America. Where were you during his acceptance speech? Please comment and share your experience of it. Mine was rooted in the personal responsibility I own of doing my part - to be the change I want to see and leave for my children. I was watching the inauguration with a few hundred Microsoft employees at our conference center. There was a cardboard cut-out of President Obama - and yes I had a friend take a picture of me hugging him at the shoulder. For now, I want to share this quote by Will Smith that I found very balanced and I interpret as tied with my theme for this era - personal responsibility. The only person that stops me from my "gold" is myself. Right on Will! Also click on his picture to hear him talk about the potential of him playing Obama in a movie some day. Will Smith For me, it was something that I've always believed. I've read the Declaration of Independence. I've read the Constitution. I have the preamble memorized. It's something I've always believed in, and when Barack Obama won, it validated a piece of me that I wasn't allowed to say out loud - that America is not a racist nation. I love that all of our excuses have been removed. African-American excuses have been removed. There's no white man trying to keep you down, because if he were really trying to keep you down, he would have done everything he could to keep Obama down. Yes, there are racist people who live here, absolutely. But they're not the majority anymore. I'm an African American, and I was able to climb to a certain point in Hollywood. On that journey, I realized people weren't trying to stop me. Most people were trying to help me. Before Obama won the presidency, it was like, I'm the exception. Tiger is the exception. Michael Jordan is the exception. Bill Cosby is the exception. But there's something about being the leader of the free world, with every other position on earth below that. You can't argue with that. If Barack Obama can win the presidency of the United States, you can absolutely be the manager at Saks. Come on. It was such a fantastic experience for me to be able to say out loud that I love America and not be called an Uncle Tom. That I can stand out, and I can say out loud that I love this country and not get funny looks. I don't think we are African Americans, Irish Americans or Japanese Americans anymore. I think Americans are a new race of people. We are Americans of African descent. We are Americans of Irish descent. It's a whole new world. (and it's up to me and you and us to be the change we seek)

I Maitri Myself

I was recently gifted "When Things Fall Apart" by Pema Chodron, an American Buddhist nun. Please watch this video (click on picture above) where she describes this Sanskrit term - Maitri. She says, about this term - "It is said that we can't attain enlightenment, let alone feel contentment and joy, without seeing who we are and what we do, without seeing our patterns and our habits. This is called maitri - developing loving-kindness and an unconditional friendship with ourselves." Much can be said about this term. Here's the first thing that struck me - sheer relief and sadness. Relief that it's that simple (but not easy). Sadness that I have spent so many years seeking the external love, without truly loving myself. I judge we live in a world where 99.9% of us suffer from this external focus. I judge we are all here at this time to grow and learn this lesson individually and as a collective consciousness. I can say a lot more but I would rather hear from you. Please comment.

The Shadow of Sex

(click on David for a video news clip) I haven't followed all the news coverage about David Duchovny checking into sex addiction rehab. What I do feel is this is a small win for us all to celebrate. To celebrate a man who is speaking his truth, holding himself accountable and doing the best for his family. Now, that's all that I see in this story and frankly don't need more 'story' to interpret any more. Think about it. Wouldn't we rather have more celebrities make this unacknowledged addiction raise higher in the public awareness? Just as Betty Ford made Alcoholics Anonymous known to the world what about sex and love addition? Imagine if Bill Clinton had taken (still can) to this crusade - I believe it would make a huge difference in our society living open and honest lives. It would make a difference in living our truth vs. the lies we tell ourselves and those we love. Please know that I don't raise this as a morale statement. In the end, how you live your life is your business but is it? How is the impact of sex and love addiction any less damaging on each and every one of us as all the scientific tests that study the impact of global warming on all of humanity? I urge you to comment on this topic and to share your perspectives. I hope this will be the beginning of many aspects of this topic and again - David, more power to you brother! (even though I don't know you)

Wood-putty my way to strength

Rabbi Ted Falcon heads the Bet Alef Meditative Synagogue. He is known for his interfaith belief system. He speaks at the Center for Spiritual Living in Seattle at least once a year and was with us last week. The theme of the month has been forgiveness. As a guest speaker Rabbi Ted said he realized that he always speaks on forgiveness when he visits CSL. So this time he chose the topic: "what's after forgiveness?" Here's a story he shared. Forgive me if I didn't take great notes - let's just say this is what I took away from his story. A father is challenged to have his pre-teen son live a responsible and virtue based life. The father had a beautiful library at home with ornate wooden bookshelves built into the wall with amazing engravings on it. Every time the son would be out of integrity the father would pound a nail into the wall. Over time there were over a hundred nails in this beautiful bookshelf wall. Then the son started to make a turn. Every time he was in integrity - the father would remove a nail. Soon all the nails were gone. When the son realized that the whole lovely wood panel was now full of wholes - he was sad. So he filled the holes with wood-putty, and finished them to look even better than before. The father noted to the son that the wood paneled wall was now stronger than it was before, thanks to his son's lessons learnt. Rabbi Ted - if you read this, apologies for not getting the story "right" but again - what I took from it is: "a Saint is just a sinner who fell down, but now gets up." It is through our trials and tribulations - when we are awake, aware and alive to them that we make amends in such a way that it makes the world a better place. Aho!

Killing of the Boy - Part 1

I believe, as many scholars, theologists and analytical psychologists (starting with Carl Jung) have proposed - that in order for a man to step into his mature masculine - the boy must die. I will be looking at this paradigm in several parts. Rites of passage are a critical element of this transition - and a ritual that has been mostly forgotten in modern times. You don't have to go on a vision quest to have a rite of passage. Here's a story that has always blown me away, told by Jack Cornfield and repeated by Rev. Kathi Anne Lewis of the Center for Spiritual Living in Seattle recently:

(click picture to watch a video of Jack Korkfield on meditation)

A 14-year old young man kills another 14-year old in a rival gang. He is sentenced to juvenile court. As he leaves the court room the mother of the boy who he killed says to him: "I will kill you." As the days pass, this mother starts to visit the young man in detention. She starts to take him cookies and books and soon is visiting him more than once a week. When he is released and has no where to go she offers him to stay with her. She pays for his education and finds him a job. Years later she asks him: "Remember when I said to you 'I will kill you?'" The young man says with fear "Yes." She replies: "Well I have. I have killed the boy who killed my son."

This story is among the most powerful examples of true compassion I have ever come across. Imagine if instead of hate and negative energy toward people, things or situations we encounter if we could be so bold as to take such a leap of faith, to believe anything is possible and most of all to truly forgive.

Please comment on what you believe makes us resonate and rise from the ashes?